Week 3– Time to Think
The Currents Beneath: Week Three – Time to Think
Over the years I’ve coached, led and developed thousands of leaders. My work is grounded in real conversations, behavioural change and performance psychology born from practice, not theory. I’ve read hundreds of books. Interrogated so many models – but I rarely talk about them. Behind the questions I ask and the shifts I help create, there’s a body of knowledge that’s shaped my approach, and theories I haven’t committed to memory but which inform how I work.
This series is my way of surfacing that – one model at a time.
These models are the currents beneath the waves of my coaching – the quiet but powerful forces that shape each leadership journey I walk alongside.
This week, a model that reshaped how I think about presence, pace and permission: Time to Think by Nancy Kline.
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Listening is leadership
I was trained as a Thinking Partner a few years ago by the fabulous Meg Peppin, and the learning stayed with me ever since. Not just as a tool – but as a stance. A way of being with someone that prioritises space over speed, presence over performance.
Kline’s core insight is simple but transformative:
“The quality of your attention determines the quality of other people’s thinking.”
It’s not just about listening. It’s about creating the conditions for someone to do their best thinking in front of you.
And those conditions are built from ten components – structured into five intentional pairs. Each pair holds a tension, a flow, a current.
My Five Pairs of a Thinking Environment
What follows is my interpretation and what I find helpful for me; if you’d like to study the original work, I really would recommend contacting Meg - she’s amazing.
Attention + Ease
The way we listen – and the pace we set. Unhurried, full presence – without interruption or pressure.Equality + Encouragement
Not just giving someone the floor, but making sure they feel they belong on it. That their thinking matters.Feelings + Appreciation
Holding the full human in the space. Allowing emotion. Noticing what’s working – not just what’s missing.Information + Incisive Questions
Removing distortion, surfacing truth, and asking questions that challenge limiting assumptions.Place + Diversity
Honouring the space – physical and psychological. Ensuring inclusion isn’t an afterthought, but a foundation.
Each pair is a rhythm. A dynamic. A choice we make to hold a better space for better thinking.
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Why I use it
I don’t always name the model. But I use it constantly.
In leadership, there’s a pull to solve, to steer, to speed things up. But this model taught me the value of slowing down. Not just to be polite – but to be effective.
I remember coaching a founder who said, “No one has ever let me think out loud without rushing me to an answer.” He didn’t need direction. He needed space. And when that space was held, his thinking clarified. Not because I said something clever – but because I didn’t interrupt the clarity that was already forming.
Sometimes the most powerful leadership move is to say nothing – and stay with someone long enough that their thinking finishes growing.
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As a leader
Early in my career, I thought leadership meant making things happen. Fast. Decisively. Articulately.
But the more I led, the more I realised the real art wasn’t in my thinking.
It was in how I helped others access theirs.
The real shift came when I stopped trying to be the voice in the room – and started becoming the space where other voices could sharpen.
Time to Think isn’t just a coaching model.
It’s a leadership act.
And a radical one in a world that values answers over awareness.
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How I show up as a Thinking Partner
When I’m coaching as a Thinking Partner, my intent is simple: to help the other person keep thinking. Not to steer them to my insight, but to hold the space long enough for theirs to emerge. That means resisting the urge to interrupt, interpret or tidy. It means trusting their thinking even when it’s not yet formed. Sometimes I’ll say, quietly: “What are you saying?”
Other times, I’ll just let the silence do the work.
Because when someone knows they won’t be interrupted, something deeper arrives.
My role isn’t to shape the content – it’s to shape the conditions that let clarity grow.
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Reflection for the week:
Leadership isn’t always about having the best ideas – it’s about creating the conditions for others to think at their best.
Where in your world is someone waiting for permission to finish their sentence – or to think beyond it?
And how might your presence change what’s possible in the room?
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This series shares the models that quietly shape how I coach. I hope it’s useful. And if it lands – let’s talk.
Next week, we explore how story shapes identity – and how leaders find language for who they’re becoming.
—Stefan
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I look forward to sharing my next OPINION blog soon.
For now; thank you
I am…
An executive coach who specialises in helping good people lead great things.
Good people care about others, our planet and beauty. Great things are changes for the betterment of society and all that lives within an around it.
It sounds big and fun - it is.
I'm also an endurance racing cyclist and a go. getter.
You can read more about me and what I do; how I work here