Oceans - Stefan’s Week-notes 19/10/2025
Inspired by the weeknotes of friends and coachees including John Fitzgerald, Steve Messer and Nour Sidawi - I thought I'd give it a go.
Weeknotes - Oceans
This week, the ocean is family.
The people who stand with and for you - even if the same blood doesn’t flow through their veins.
The ones who hold you when you need to rise, and remind you to rest when the tide’s been rough.
“Family is not defined by our genes, it is built and maintained through love.” - Amalia G.
What moments lit me up this week?
This week I was lit up by a dear friend who stepped forward in my family’s hour of need. Thursday demanded a big pull up and out of the water - to face into some challenges that couldn’t be sidestepped. They reminded me of something simple and essential: sometimes the most courageous act is to clear the diary, re-group, and do what needs to be done with full presence.
“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement… that is a friend who cares.” - Henri Nouwen
What did I wrestle with this week?
I wrestled with a conversation that brought a different kind of challenge - the realisation that stewardship, in this instance, meant letting go. That my role wasn’t to steer, but to step back and let someone else paddle the waters.
“Sometimes letting go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on.” - Eckhart Tolle
What personal moments felt significant this week?
Being the recipient of help rather than the giver - and learning to accept it fully. It’s humbling, uncomfortable even, to be cared for when you’re usually the one holding others steady. But it reminded me that strength isn’t only in what we give - it’s in allowing ourselves to be held.
The past two days with Will and Vera deepened that lesson. Just being together - laughter, hugs, shared silliness - was a reminder of what anchors me most. Among all the noise and decisions, they draw me back to something simple and sacred: presence, love, and the small rituals that make a family.
Moments around the table, moments on the sofa, moments doing nothing at all - they stitched the week back together.
Where did you see stewardship in practice this week?
In one of my coaching clients - a leader navigating transformation who realised that “the human” needed to come back into the change they were driving. Not because they’d forgotten it, but because it takes more humanity to lead when others aren’t showing it towards you.
“Leadership is not about being in charge. It is about taking care of those in your charge.” - Simon Sinek
What metaphor or image captures the feeling of this week?
What’s left after a wave crashes over the beach - the calm that follows. Thursday felt like that, as did the moment a single question unlocked something deep for a client.
What did I notice beneath the surface this week?
That we’re not mirror-signalling and manoeuvring as we used to - on the road, or in life. It feels like a lost art. I recorded a walk and talk video about it - a reflection on awareness, anticipation, and the small acts that keep us safe and seen.
What am I carrying forward into next week?
The meetings I had to cancel - or rather, pulled back - to help with a family challenge. It wasn’t an easy decision, but it was the right one. A reminder that presence can’t be delegated, and sometimes the most important work isn’t on the calendar.
I’m carrying forward a new diary structure, one shaped by that realisation - built for steadiness rather than speed, and for calm rather than control. Space to think, to breathe, and to be where I’m most needed.
Less chasing the tide, more moving with it.
How do I want to sign off this week?
With a question:
Is the level of pressure you’re carrying maintainable until the end of the year?
If not, pull back a little. For a friend this week, it wasn’t.
In endurance cycling, we have a saying: “One gear less.”
Ride one gear lower than you feel you can - that’s the pace and power that sustains endurance.
And that, for me, is the role of stewardship.
This week reminded me that stewardship always begins with self.
Before we can hold responsibility for others, we have to hold it for what’s within our care - our energy, our presence, our people.
On Tuesday, I wrote about the Ten Facets of Self-Stewardship - the ways we sustain integrity and calm amid complexity and this week was a lived practice of that: grace in accepting help, rhythm in pulling back, courage in showing up where it mattered most.
Stewardship, like the tide, begins at home.
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For now; thank you
I am…
An executive coach and the CEO of Be The Waves, growing stewardship for a thriving planet.
I helping good people lead great things; in other words - I empower Stewardship
Good people care about others, our planet and beauty. Great things are changes for the betterment of society and all that lives within an around it. It sounds big and fun - it is.
I'm also an endurance racing cyclist and a go getter.
You can read more about me and what I do; how I work here