Enough - Stefan’s Week-notes 05/07/2
Inspired by the weeknotes of friends and coachees including John Fitzgerald, Steve Messer and Nour Sidawi - I thought I'd give it a go.
Introduction
This week, I find myself reflecting on the messy, beautiful complexity of presence - being fully here in the tension of growth, rest and uncertainty. Life and leadership are not tidy; they are lived in edges, shifts and the quiet spaces between action and reflection. Presence means leaning into that messiness with kindness and curiosity, something I am learning to hold even more gently for myself.
1. What Went Well?
I had a deeply meaningful debrief this week with a CEO of a charity, having recently interviewed here entire leadership team. Initially, the tone was one of heavy ownership - “this is my fault.” But as we talked, the space shifted. She stepped into a stance of collective responsibility, a mature recognition that leadership is shared.
“I need to hold some conversations” and “I’m going to do this and this,” she said, articulating clear next steps. It was a first-class response - vulnerable yet grounded, insightful yet pragmatic. That moment opened a pathway toward collective change in the team, and it made me hopeful about the work ahead at the leadership away day later this month.
This felt like a moment of presence - acknowledging the messiness of challenge but stepping forward anyway.
2. What Lit Me Up?
The Woods Rat Run - a 256 km, 7800 ft climbing, off-road bikepacking trip - lit me up in a way few recent rides have. It was wild and unruly, the kind of ride where green walls close in, brambles claw at your legs, and the trail disappears into nettles. It was hard - day two especially was a mechanical and mental challenge, turning a big ride into a gruelling slog. Yet it was also character building. The patches where local bike shops patched me up with kindness and spares restored my faith in community and generosity.
In writing about it, I said:
“The Woods Rat Run is as wild as its name suggests. Nettles are not a warning but a fact of life here. It is a ride that bites back, a test of patience and grit.”
Riding like this demanded total presence - to body, terrain and mind - and that aliveness is what lit me up. It reminded me why I ride not just for speed or stats, but for the humbling experience of pushing through wild edges.
3. The Chat I Can’t Stop Thinking About
An ex-regional manager I once led, reached out after nearly ten years. They said, “I’m going through a lot of change and you were on my list of people to speak to…You are an incredible coach.” I could have cried. It made my week.
The grace in that conversation and exchange - simple, human, real - reminded me how coaching relationships, even years later, hold a quiet but powerful place in people’s journeys. It is why this work matters.
As I have found myself saying over the years, Grace isn’t about perfection; it’s about presence in the messiness of life. That presence is exactly what this moment felt like.
4. What Shifted?
My body shifted this week. After the bikepacking trip, I’m aching - and yet, I’m hungry to ride again. Long rides where there is space to think and breathe. Last year, riding was a priority. This year, I’ve been focused on recovering from injury and growing the business. But the balance has to shift back, and it will.
I believe we can only truly focus on three to five things at once - and that those things should be chosen by what brings us energy or joy. That belief, influenced by work I’ve read on flow and honed through years of coaching, reminds me to pause and notice what’s calling for my attention - and to tune in fully.
Presence, in this season, means listening closely to my body’s subtler signals, even in fatigue. It means treating rest as part of rhythm. Not as indulgence, but as intention - a vital ingredient of growth. It’s not just about managing time or tasks, but about choosing where and how to place my energy, and why.
5. What Am I Wrestling With?
I am wrestling with how to balance the discipline and structure needed to grow this business with the freedom to do what I love, to try new things, to follow curiosities.
This week, I spoke with bike manufacturers, elite sportspeople, CEOs. I play many roles - coach, strategist, entrepreneur - and I love that. The question is: how do I express that multiplicity authentically and get paid fairly for it all?
It is the classic tension of entrepreneurship - freedom and structure, passion and payment.
This wrestling itself is presence - holding the tension without rushing to fix or resolve.
6. What Do I See at the Edges?
At the edges, I sense an urgent call to wakefulness - the climate crisis is no longer distant, and yet many still turn away. That tension between awareness and denial feels dangerous and uncomfortable, pressing me to stay present and act where I can.
Leaning into this means practical, everyday choices: cycling more, cutting single use plastics, supporting sustainable food, and reducing energy use. But it also means recognising that climate action goes beyond forests. David Attenborough’s Oceans documentary lays bare how vital our seas are - regulating climate, sustaining biodiversity, and supporting livelihoods globally. Protecting marine ecosystems, reducing ocean plastic pollution, and pushing for sustainable fishing are critical parts of the puzzle.
In organisations, it is about embedding this broader understanding of sustainability into culture and practice - reducing waste and carbon footprints, setting measurable goals, and choosing suppliers who respect ocean and land health alike. Climate responsibility is systemic and collective.
Globally, this edge calls for sustained advocacy for stronger policies on ocean conservation, emissions reduction, and climate justice.
Holding this edge is challenging but necessary. It invites me to grow in awareness and commitment - becoming part of the solution, not by standing apart, but by leaning in.
7. Look at This
I have worked with my cycling coach and friend Joe Staunton of Ceyreste Performance nearly three years now, and I am proud to shout about him - as are his other clients. Yet I notice an odd disconnect between how readily we celebrate sports coaching and how hesitant we are to name or seek executive coaching in leadership.
This week on linkedin, I wrote about how we celebrate the coach behind the Olympian, the tactician behind the cycling team, the mentor behind the medal - but hesitate to acknowledge coaching in our own “gold medal” moments:
a high-stakes interview
a tough quarter
a creative leap
getting a team to truly function
We get shy about naming the coach, awkward about asking for help, convinced we should manage it all alone.
But leadership today is vast - emotional, strategic, systemic. Asking for help isn’t just okay; it is essential. Sometimes that help must come from outside our system - a coach, a sounding board, a thought partner unentangled by internal dynamics.
The question I ended the piece with, feels right to share here now:
If Olympians ask for coaching, why not leaders? Leadership is an Olympic sport, too.
And I promised a group of coaches I would lean into this question mover the coming months…
8. The Word I’m Carrying
The word I’m carrying is tired. After the bikepacking trip, my body feels heavy with fatigue, yet my spirit is motivated to do more. The tension between exhaustion and drive is a place of learning.
I have needed to let my body rest - to truly listen to what it demands.
As poet David Whyte writes:
“Rest and be kind, you have only just enough time.”
Tiredness is not weakness; it is a vital part of growth, a call to kindness, to renewal. Presence here means honouring limits as part of the journey.
9. This Week’s Question
What if I could? What would that mean?
Take a piece of paper. Write this question down. Let the answer come freely, without judgement. Often, it is not the answers but the space we create to ask big questions that frees us.
What possibilities open when you allow yourself to imagine without limits?
Presence is sometimes simply the gift of space to imagine.
10. What I’m Grateful For
I’m grateful for my friends who lean on me and let me lean back - especially Jason. Our post-ride chats have become a ritual of sorts: debriefing not just the route but what drove us to ride it that way, what we were testing, what we were carrying.
This week’s ride wasn’t the hardest or fastest, but it meant something. It reminded me that what sits beneath performance is often much more personal - legacy, peace, proving something quietly to yourself. As we talked, I realised again how much of that gets shaped in motion, and how grounding it is to have someone to process it with.
Some rides, like friendships, are stitched together by presence - not speed. And that, I’m learning, is what stays in the muscle.
11. Where I’m Rooted
This week, I am rooted in enough - enough being, enough having, and the boundaries needed to live and breathe a happy life.
Psychologist Carl Rogers wrote:
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”
This acceptance is grounding. It is the soil from which growth springs.
I am also reminded of Parker Palmer’s wisdom, what I’ll call ‘staying rooted in the dark’ - holding presence in uncertainty and difficulty - so that light and growth can emerge fully.
12. What I’m Reading
I have been re-visiting Free and Equal by Daniel Chandler, which has deepened my thinking on identity and belonging. Chandler explores how our sense of freedom is entangled with the stories we tell ourselves about equality and agency.
It is a reminder that presence is not just about individual awareness but about the cultural and social narratives we navigate - the systems we both challenge and inhabit.
This reading invites me to stay present to the broader stories shaping my work and my world.
Conclusion
Presence in the messiness of life is the thread weaving through everything this week - in leadership, in riding, in rest and in relationship. It is about leaning into uncertainty with kindness, holding tension without rushing, and allowing space for growth that is often quiet and unseen.
In embracing this, I am learning that presence itself is a form of leadership - one that invites us to be fully human, imperfect, and wonderfully connected.
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For now; thank you
I am…
An executive coach who specialises in helping good people lead great things.
Good people care about others, our planet and beauty. Great things are changes for the betterment of society and all that lives within an around it.
It sounds big and fun - it is.
I'm also an endurance racing cyclist and a go. getter.
You can read more about me and what I do; how I work here